Mic On Monday: Dear Daddy...

Barack Obama is in the White House. America must now confront it's belief that black men are not in the home, that black men are not good fathers, that black men cannot provide for their families. Mr. Obama may be the father of a new hope & this era of change, but good responsible and nurturing black fathers are more prevalent than The Maury Povich Show would have us to believe. The positive black male presence is non-existent in most mainstream media. If a black man gives back to his community, he's given a 30-second blurb on the evening news; however, when a black athlete or musician commits a crime, he's glorified as if his poor behavior is what is to be expected of all black males. Anything better is frowned upon or ignored. Rappers T.I. & Lil Wayne provided money, afterschool programs, and housing for their respective communities. MTV & even BET covered the stories in less than five minutes. T.I. was recently incarcerated for weapons charges and Lil Wayne is facing jail time as well. Both artists' crimes and jail sentences have been the subject of several media outlets' Top Stories lists. Thus, it is easy and commonplace for the general public to perpetuate the lazy, careless, & absent black male stereotype.


Father's Day 2009 is a prime time to reflect on those men who have been present in our lives as father-figures. It's easy to look celebrities and socialites as if they are our only source of leadership. But, there was a time before our infatuation with glitz and glamour that we valued the town police officer, doctor, fireman, teacher, & pastor. Being a father figure and a positive male role model was important and a privilege that held more prestige than rims, bling, and the amount of women one has. Many insensitive, aimless, irresponsible males do create offspring and choose not to care for them. However, our society chooses to publicize their shortcomings & apply them to the majority who do care and provide for their families. This year's celebration of fathers should reflect the change Obama speaks of and the hope of America's future. We should rebel against the recession that aims to discount our fathers' presence and their great works. Our fathers deserve to be acknowledged for more than simply aiding in our conception.

To My Father

Daddy,

It's been said that I have your ears & your temperment. I hear your voice when I stray from the path I know to be right for me. I hate getting dirty but because of you I know that a gentleman can sweat and get the job done and still look smooth and be attractive. I am slow to speak because you taught me that actions always speak louder than words, unless an ass-whooping was in order. You never taught me to wait for anyone else when I could take care of myself. I know what hard work is, but more importantly I know what hard work & good planning can accomplish because I see it everyday when I look in the mirror and reflect on our home & our life. I know that I have the world in my hands because you've placed it in my palms. I know that negativity isn't worth my time & that negative people don't deserve my company. I know that you're proud of me & that you love me; your hugs tell me that this is true. I know that you may not always understand me but you still listen and let me sort through my own confusion. I know that I have safety & peace & assurance because you're only a phone call away. You welcomed my partner into our family & we're both grateful for your support. He reminds me of you in many ways, but the longer I am with him I realize that I remind me of you. My limbs are becoming wrought with veins that say

"I'm not afraid to take my future into my own hands."

Those same veins are what I prayed for when I didn't think I looked enough like you. I wanted people to say I looked strong like my daddy, that I spoke strong like my daddy, that I made every moment count like my daddy. I'm still learning. I can still shit-talk with the best of 'em because you taught me that sometimes life is just bullshit and trees. I know that my daddy is the first man to love me without any strings attached and Scott's learning this, too.

Thank you, Daddy, for not letting go when you could have so many times before.

I love you, Michael.